Don't know how to feel

Step throat

i have it. and i have moved back into my own, place in the city. enjoying time spent with new lovers and friends, despite having been laid-off last week. i'm still optimistic about the world. i just need a new job...

the only shit part of my life right now is... missing this person.

Sunshine up my ass.

So much has gone down in the last 5 months, I can't really even begin to compute it all.

Back in Berlin, now Vienna, then back to Berlin again tomorrow. Today I opted to stay at the house rather than go with the kids to Beethoven's grave. Karaoke nights, Guitar Hero, old friends, free beer that puts that hipster swill back home to shame. Shit, I really can't get over how fucking amazing my life is. So amazing that I don't have time to update, ever :)

Yeah, even though there is so much shit, I am loving life.

sssssaturday

PS check my hair transformation in the past 72 hours. it's nutso!

Started with:





Ended with:

New to-do list

• decide on recipes for thanksgiving (which i am hosting this year, eep!)
• don't let other people's wintertime depression get me down
• organize hallway closet
• search for cheap tickets for berlin new years.
• be more adventurous with my outfits
• be honest with my intentions
• get a fucking job!
• get a job on fucking crapitol hill if at all possible!!!
• create playlist from my shuffle the past couple days (it's been good!)
• stop waking up so god damn early (woke up before 7 the past week)
• stop going to bed so fucking early!
  

living the lovely life

that thing with whitney sure didn´t last long. not sure all of you even knew it existed. i feel like a complete idiot for even giving that a chance. but honestly, fuck that shit i´m already over it :-)

wednesday night, went to a free concert claudius was putting on in lovelite. and blah blah blah i end up in the archway of an old church on rigaerstrasse, making out with a cute irish boy, after a 10 minute cab ride to wedding. spent all of the next day in bed together, holding hands, watching old movies with tony curtis, like the sweet smell of success. spent the next 3 days in bed together. so sweet it makes me sick. we sit on my roof deck in the morning after i make him breakfast that we eat in bed. drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes. holding hands still, not saying anything. we both comment on how nice it feels to just BE with some one. no artificial fluff conversation necessary, "it´s like we´re some old couple that has been together for 50 years..." he says. i just smile and he kisses my check and takes another cigarette out of his pack of pall malls.

i´m happy right now.